78 Comments

I love how you wrote about death. It’s bluntness. Inexplicable. Here and then not. It’s too much. I sorry for your loss, really. There seems to be so much of that these days.

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"punches a hole in your soul" says it all. To all our lost beloveds.

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Susan, I enjoy your posts very much, and always find wisdom, insight and wry humor in them. This one was a gut punch, because the sentiments you expressed are so true, and are only magnified by the morass of bad news we are struggling through. I am so sorry for your loss.

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Thank you, Maureen.

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Susan, I'm so sorry you've lost your friend. Thank you for the lovely essay of tribute.

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It’s so, so heartbreaking. Thanks, Benjamin.

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I've wondered in the past if expected death punches a different sized "hole in the soul " than an unexpected death. I'm old enough to have encountered both varieties and can say, for myself anyway, there is no difference. The hole lingers, maybe shrinks a little, but always there. My condolences to you, Susan, for the loss of a very special freind.

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This is a beautiful tribute to your fiend. Friends to the end and beyond by sharing the memory of that friend is the best tribute. Great job.

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I’m not sure why, but things that I used to read don’t bring me much comfort these days. Your essays, even the recent ones about disasters are what I want to read. I’m so sorry the world has lost a beautiful woman. Thank you for being a touchstone.

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Susan - thank you for so eloquently writing about your dear friend...the loss of someone so close is tragic, especially in such difficult times...keep writing and loving animals - xxx

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Yes - exactly. I still look at my sister's final texts and emails for...something. And I still reach for my phone to text her something stupid no one else would get. How is she not here? xoxoxox

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Beautiful tribute to your wonderful friend. I am sorry that you & the other people who loved her and her animals have lost her to the world in which she so vibrantly lived. And I think you do know more about death & loss than you realize. Your words gave me comfort.💗

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the shape that person’s loss marks you forever, her memory etched upon you for all to see. very sorry for your loss, thank you for sharing the love of your friend with us, we’ll bear some of that mark with you now too.

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Instead of “met” I have used “connected on the internet” - and then I actually MET an internet friend from Australia when she came to my state to do a lecture at a local university, so I instantly invited her to stay with my family… this was back in 1999 I think - so we MET in real life.

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You have such a smooth way of writing, Ms. Orlean, of digging into really profound thoughts with grace. With feelings like a Gershwin glissando. All of the deaths we all work with are our own treasure trove of being alive as you suggest. And philosophy and religion bring out the writer in us, one and all, till we take off like James puffing up to put off predators. When maybe, as you have the courage to suggest, we just die as we are supposed to at the end of our lives and with luck become compost under a huge, sprawling sycamore down by the creek bed.

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I'm so sorry...it feels like that particular kind of loss--the disappearance of a loved one in our life--must feel especially savage in these times where it seems we're experiencing so much loss of goodness in the world. IK words can't heal your pain, but I hope that the love expressed by all those here will soothe you. Sending mine.

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❤️

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I am sorry for your loss.

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Susan, I'm so sorry for your loss

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❤️

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