I am in the middle of attempting to pare down my wardrobe. I'm ashamed to admit this, but I own 45 pairs of jeans, both blue denim and colored denim. How I got to this point is a long story but my new fashion motto is "you can't manage what you don't measure". So I am documenting my wardrobe. Reading this post about buying things that match, I realize that is one of my problems. I buy random clothes without a plan. If you own purple, pink, olive, blue, black, cream, violet, mustard, brown, gray, tan, white,striped, camo, brick red and cherry red jeans - how can you possibly have pieces to go with all of them? p.s. enjoying your posts about fashion!
There’s something poignant about graduating into our mothers or any woman of a previous generation that we admired. It’s a true rite of passage, no matter how old you are. I remember those women’s reliable perfumed scent and the way my mother mixed shades lipstick together - applying two or three of them at a restaurant table after the meal was over. I wonder what our kids will remember as quintessentially, reliably, grownup us.
I loved this post! This was my mother AND I had the exact same "uniform" in the early 70's.....black leotard, cream colored painters pants and clogs! I always got a side eye from my friends but I felt comfy and put together. My dress up option was one particular corduroy mini skirt with, you guessed it a black leotard black tights and Frye flats.....oh how I long for those days!
Your mother was right! I always regret those solo purchases I make. Can never find anything
to wear with them. I just purchased a pair of cashmerey pants online thinking I was getting the "set". It was just the pants. They are completely out of the sweater, and I have checked online daily to try and find it. What would your mother say? I think she'd say "return the pants!". But i'm going to persist in my efforts to try and find the damn sweater!!! xoxo
The one that Nancy above is looking for. I figure everyone has their own way of scouring the internet, so we could all team-search and see if we can find the top somewhere.
It is the CashSoft Shaker-Stich Sweater #816706 in Petite -Medium Color: LIght Heather Gray. I keep calling them and checking the web site multiple times a day.
I enjoyed your essay, the insecurities abound as women attempt to strike the right note of casual attractiveness. My shopping habits lean to mountains if separates but I succumbed to a knit top and coordinating pants. Very comfy, but it looked like something from the low end department that elderly women wear. I will keep them for pjs. I refuse to dress my age.(80)
Finding the perfect outfit doesn't depend on matching the entire ensemble. For me, I think of the basic Color Wheel. What colors compliment each other? It's okay to change up your tops and bottoms from matching. Personally, if I'm wearing something that is matching I feel as if I'm in a work uniform. (Unless it's all black of course, lol). I prefer to challenge myself and push some colors together. My outfits have caused many 'discussions ' in our family over my lifetime. But it's just clothes. Before you torch your closet, find a color wheel, and work to pair up clothes that compliment each other. I'm sure you will find so much joy from all the treasures you've purchased over the years. Good luck!
Fantastic read. Brought laughter and memories of my mom. She did the set wardrobe. I miss those times of seeing women out and about put together. I actually see people wearing pajamas while shopping. How times have changed.
Thank you for bringing memories and laughter to my mind as I start my day. You are a wonderful writer.
Interesting. Really lovely prose portrait of your mom, and loved reading how you’ve connected with her approach to clothing choices. My mother was exactly the same. Exactly. And the colors of some of those sets were awesome, as well. Kurt Andersen pointed out that until the last few decades, you could readily identify the period of a photograph because fashions changed so dramatically, in upheavals, but now we’ve pretty much reached a stasis.
You are so right! And so many clothes are so poorly made! I’m so tired of it and cars! Same thing with cars… they are so similar now you can’t easily tell them apart from any distance. And what’s with grey cars?!? I see them and think they look unfinished… primer gray or submarine gray like the sub in the Museum of Science and Industry in Chicago. Ok, sorry to rant, just frustrated with the lack of individualism and creativity in this “modern” age!
I loved your mother wisdom story! I grew up with “outfits”, my mom was a mix and match stylist. My mother in law was steadfast in matching ensembles-I inherited a whole rainbow of thread she had collected for the repair of buttons on these clothes.
I wrote a comic book about mother wisdom on housework - which I ignored! I just put up a digital link to the book
For ten years I worked at Closet Factory in San Diego. Closets were my specialty and my women clients loved me. I doubled and sometimes tripled the space behind a simple sliding door. Many walk- in closets were the size of a full bedroom. Like you, most of those women had no direction to their clunky wardrobes. They wore the same things 80% of the time and the rest 20% because they couldn’t remember or see what they had. One hanging rod cluttered with clothes is a brain tease! A small investment to get organized goes a long way. Ie; If you double hang 4 ft of an 8 ft closet (blouses on top/ skirts and pants below), you add another 4 ft for a section of long hang with shelves above for purses and a section for shoe shelves. Ten shelves with 3 pairs = 30 pairs in one eye shot.
Color coordinate your pieces and you’ll really save time and money! I guarantee it. And of course— you’ll always look well put together.😉
Do we become our mothers? From my personal experience, the answer is yes. And no. The "yes" sneaks up on us, as you described so well. I never thought I'd have the waist my mom did--I work out and she never did!--but I still do. My mother's gift of choice in her 80's was a sweater set, and I have a sneaking suspicion that mine will be the same thing. Matchy matchy is fun fun and easy easy.
This is a walk down memorr lane. My mother was very similar to your mother. She grew up very poor, became a teacher, started having money for a wardrobe. Her excuse was that ‘the children notice what you wear’, but she loved classic good quality sets of clothing, and every fall and spring she marched me and my sister off for new winter and summer outfits. Nothing white or pastel before Easter; no cotton or white or pastel for school. White boater with ribbon, white gloves, white lacy socks and black patent Mary Janes along with peach houndstooth jacket and skirt for Easter Sunday (I still have the photo somewhere of me in that in front of our new 1964 Impala, as we ate an ice cream). I remember modelling school aged 14-15 (don’t ask why), where I was taught to pick 2 colour ranges which would go together (mine were blue and yellow) and never buy anything outside of those ranges, other than ‘neutral’ ie beige, black, navy, grey, cream or white, and NEVER wear white shoes or belts because white makes everything it’s over stand out and look bigger. Like my size 11 feet and now non-existent ‘waist’ (after 6 kids and 5 more decades). It was all good advice but better still was not worrying about what people thought about my appearance unless I wanted to manipulate their impressions to achieve a goal, which I came up with all by myself. All good stuff. Congratulations on your debut!
I am in the middle of attempting to pare down my wardrobe. I'm ashamed to admit this, but I own 45 pairs of jeans, both blue denim and colored denim. How I got to this point is a long story but my new fashion motto is "you can't manage what you don't measure". So I am documenting my wardrobe. Reading this post about buying things that match, I realize that is one of my problems. I buy random clothes without a plan. If you own purple, pink, olive, blue, black, cream, violet, mustard, brown, gray, tan, white,striped, camo, brick red and cherry red jeans - how can you possibly have pieces to go with all of them? p.s. enjoying your posts about fashion!
There’s something poignant about graduating into our mothers or any woman of a previous generation that we admired. It’s a true rite of passage, no matter how old you are. I remember those women’s reliable perfumed scent and the way my mother mixed shades lipstick together - applying two or three of them at a restaurant table after the meal was over. I wonder what our kids will remember as quintessentially, reliably, grownup us.
I loved this post! This was my mother AND I had the exact same "uniform" in the early 70's.....black leotard, cream colored painters pants and clogs! I always got a side eye from my friends but I felt comfy and put together. My dress up option was one particular corduroy mini skirt with, you guessed it a black leotard black tights and Frye flats.....oh how I long for those days!
I only buy black.
I only buy yellow tops and dark trousers.
You and Andrew Huberman. :)
I’m trying to stop. So far, adding gray is as far as I’ve got.
Gray is good
This article was so lovely. Then I noticed it was by Susan Orlean! Of course. I loved every word. The ballerina construction worker did me in.
Thank you!!!
Me too!!
Ahhh so happy to read this here; and you are making me think now, I want to do a story on sets that aren’t sets but behave like sets :)
So excited to see your comment! I am a fan and loyal semi-addicted customer!
Your mother was right! I always regret those solo purchases I make. Can never find anything
to wear with them. I just purchased a pair of cashmerey pants online thinking I was getting the "set". It was just the pants. They are completely out of the sweater, and I have checked online daily to try and find it. What would your mother say? I think she'd say "return the pants!". But i'm going to persist in my efforts to try and find the damn sweater!!! xoxo
Persist!!! Find the top!!! Xxx
I am trying!!
Do you have a link to the set?
Which set? Happy to look but I'm not sure which set you mean... thanks!
The one that Nancy above is looking for. I figure everyone has their own way of scouring the internet, so we could all team-search and see if we can find the top somewhere.
I'd like a link to the cashmere set.
I should have posted this here... do you have a link to the cashmere set?
Yikes, I don’t think I mentioned a cashmere set!!!
she was emailing me toots!
🤣🤣
It is the CashSoft Shaker-Stich Sweater #816706 in Petite -Medium Color: LIght Heather Gray. I keep calling them and checking the web site multiple times a day.
I enjoyed your essay, the insecurities abound as women attempt to strike the right note of casual attractiveness. My shopping habits lean to mountains if separates but I succumbed to a knit top and coordinating pants. Very comfy, but it looked like something from the low end department that elderly women wear. I will keep them for pjs. I refuse to dress my age.(80)
What about the gloves!? My mother never went out without gloves.
Mine even took a hat-making course so she'd always have a matching hat!
Finding the perfect outfit doesn't depend on matching the entire ensemble. For me, I think of the basic Color Wheel. What colors compliment each other? It's okay to change up your tops and bottoms from matching. Personally, if I'm wearing something that is matching I feel as if I'm in a work uniform. (Unless it's all black of course, lol). I prefer to challenge myself and push some colors together. My outfits have caused many 'discussions ' in our family over my lifetime. But it's just clothes. Before you torch your closet, find a color wheel, and work to pair up clothes that compliment each other. I'm sure you will find so much joy from all the treasures you've purchased over the years. Good luck!
Fantastic read. Brought laughter and memories of my mom. She did the set wardrobe. I miss those times of seeing women out and about put together. I actually see people wearing pajamas while shopping. How times have changed.
Thank you for bringing memories and laughter to my mind as I start my day. You are a wonderful writer.
Interesting. Really lovely prose portrait of your mom, and loved reading how you’ve connected with her approach to clothing choices. My mother was exactly the same. Exactly. And the colors of some of those sets were awesome, as well. Kurt Andersen pointed out that until the last few decades, you could readily identify the period of a photograph because fashions changed so dramatically, in upheavals, but now we’ve pretty much reached a stasis.
You are so right! And so many clothes are so poorly made! I’m so tired of it and cars! Same thing with cars… they are so similar now you can’t easily tell them apart from any distance. And what’s with grey cars?!? I see them and think they look unfinished… primer gray or submarine gray like the sub in the Museum of Science and Industry in Chicago. Ok, sorry to rant, just frustrated with the lack of individualism and creativity in this “modern” age!
I loved your mother wisdom story! I grew up with “outfits”, my mom was a mix and match stylist. My mother in law was steadfast in matching ensembles-I inherited a whole rainbow of thread she had collected for the repair of buttons on these clothes.
I wrote a comic book about mother wisdom on housework - which I ignored! I just put up a digital link to the book
http://tinyurl.com/mindydwyer-housedress
(Or go to mindydwyer.com under comics to read it)
For ten years I worked at Closet Factory in San Diego. Closets were my specialty and my women clients loved me. I doubled and sometimes tripled the space behind a simple sliding door. Many walk- in closets were the size of a full bedroom. Like you, most of those women had no direction to their clunky wardrobes. They wore the same things 80% of the time and the rest 20% because they couldn’t remember or see what they had. One hanging rod cluttered with clothes is a brain tease! A small investment to get organized goes a long way. Ie; If you double hang 4 ft of an 8 ft closet (blouses on top/ skirts and pants below), you add another 4 ft for a section of long hang with shelves above for purses and a section for shoe shelves. Ten shelves with 3 pairs = 30 pairs in one eye shot.
Color coordinate your pieces and you’ll really save time and money! I guarantee it. And of course— you’ll always look well put together.😉
Do we become our mothers? From my personal experience, the answer is yes. And no. The "yes" sneaks up on us, as you described so well. I never thought I'd have the waist my mom did--I work out and she never did!--but I still do. My mother's gift of choice in her 80's was a sweater set, and I have a sneaking suspicion that mine will be the same thing. Matchy matchy is fun fun and easy easy.
This is a walk down memorr lane. My mother was very similar to your mother. She grew up very poor, became a teacher, started having money for a wardrobe. Her excuse was that ‘the children notice what you wear’, but she loved classic good quality sets of clothing, and every fall and spring she marched me and my sister off for new winter and summer outfits. Nothing white or pastel before Easter; no cotton or white or pastel for school. White boater with ribbon, white gloves, white lacy socks and black patent Mary Janes along with peach houndstooth jacket and skirt for Easter Sunday (I still have the photo somewhere of me in that in front of our new 1964 Impala, as we ate an ice cream). I remember modelling school aged 14-15 (don’t ask why), where I was taught to pick 2 colour ranges which would go together (mine were blue and yellow) and never buy anything outside of those ranges, other than ‘neutral’ ie beige, black, navy, grey, cream or white, and NEVER wear white shoes or belts because white makes everything it’s over stand out and look bigger. Like my size 11 feet and now non-existent ‘waist’ (after 6 kids and 5 more decades). It was all good advice but better still was not worrying about what people thought about my appearance unless I wanted to manipulate their impressions to achieve a goal, which I came up with all by myself. All good stuff. Congratulations on your debut!